The Tale of Rana

Today is the Holy Day of Rana, Goddess of Clouds. Gotta love those clouds. Everybody loves those clouds, especially when they're personified in such a pleasing form such as Rana's.




Born of humidity and the air, the most beautiful and serene goddess, Rana, floats above us on the clouds, bringing Her infinite love to all.

Many years ago, before most of the gods had been born, Sorosotuzho, God of the Atmosphere, was the King of the Gods. Sorosotuzho possessed the Tablet of Destinies, which along with setting out the order of all living things and civilization as a whole, also declared the owner of the tablet to be the Ruler of the Universe.

Since Rana was and is the most lovely and desirable of all the goddesses, Sorosotuzho selected Her to be the wife of His son Korutuzho, God of Agriculture. Rana, however, did not love Korutuzho. Her one true love was and is Her brother Rékaré, God of Rock. She married Korutuzho, nevertheless, obeying Sorosotuzho’s demand.

Knowing that Rana and Rékaré would not be kept apart, Their mother Rakazhazhíní, Goddess of Clean Air, laid a curse upon Her daughter so that Rana could not bear children on any day of the year. Even though Rakazhazhíní had placed the curse to prevent children of incest, the curse also prevented Rana from bearing any of Korutuzho’s children, and so She remained childless in marriage.

When Rana learned of this curse, She realized there would be no downside to visiting Rékaré’s bed as often as She pleased. And so She did.

The devious Sívorí, Goddess of the Stars, decided that She could not let Rana be with the one She loved. Sívorí hatched a plan to expose Rana’s love affair to Korutuzho. Sívorí challenged Sorosotuzho to a game of dice, which He gladly accepted. At that time, since Tarénara, Goddess of Hunting and Lady of the Moon, had not yet been born, Sorosotuzho controlled the cycle of the moon. Sívorí goaded the King of the Gods into wagering a day of moon time, which He did.

With Sívorí’s skill at dice -- whether honest or not -- She easily won that moon day. Sívorí promptly inserted the day at the end of the calendar, which is why we have 365 days in a year and not just the 364 that fit into thirteen months of 28. Once this day was in the year, Rana’s pregnancy began.

Ashamed that Her husband would thus learn of Her affair with Rékaré, Rana vowed to make it up to Korutuzho. She decided to steal the Tablet of Destinies from His father and present it to Korutuzho, thus granting Him control of the universe.

Sorosotuzho kept the Tablet of Destinies on an easel beside His throne. Sorosotuzho’s throne room sat at the very center of His castle, behind a series of seven well-guarded gates. The entire castle was underground, since Sorosotuzho wished to be as near as possible to His mother Kara, Goddess of Soil. Therefore, as you can see, Rana had quite a task in front of Her to steal the tablet.

At the first gate, the guards stopped Rana, refusing to open it and let Her enter. She began to dance in a most seductive manner, singing to them songs of love. The guards were entranced. As part of Her dance, Rana removed Her bejeweled caul, letting it flutter to the ground. Her hair flowed freely, mesmerizing the guards. They begged Her to remove more clothing. Rana promised to do so, if only they opened the gate.

The gate flew open and Rana ran through. She raced to the second gate, where She began a dance for those guards. The first set of guards caught up with Her, and when She dropped Her cloak, the first guards demanded that the second guards open their gate so She would continue disrobing.

All the guards were equally entranced. The gate opened. Dancing and singing along the way, enjoying Her entourage of enthralled guards, Rana proceeded to the third gate.

At each successive gate, Rana removed another article of clothing, revealing another portion of Her beauty and further enchanting the guards. She untied and let drop Her girdle belt, letting Her dresses sway with Her every movement. She shimmied out of Her outer dress, eliciting a gasp from all the guards. She slipped out of Her shoes and stockings, slowly and sensually giving the guards a sneak of Her long and slender legs. She let Her inner dress drop to the floor, leaving Rana wearing nothing but Her thin shift and a dazzling smile.

At the final gate, Rana danced out of Her shift. The guards ogled Her firm and full breasts. They stared transfixed at Her slim waist and round buttocks. The gate crashed open.

With nary a stitch of clothing and all eyes upon Her stunning figure, Rana sashayed across Sorosotuzho’s throne room. With the King of the Gods and several of His closest friends standing nearby, stunned in amazement, Rana sat Herself upon the throne and overwhelmed everyone with a flash of Her smile.

Only then did She realize that the Tablet of Destinies was not there. Its easel stood empty. Sorosotuzho saw Her face drop and laughed. As He had His guards seize Her, Sorosotuzho told Rana that He had given the Tablet of Destinies to Hívo, God of Clean Water, for safekeeping. Rana was led to a dark, dank dungeon and locked in solitude.

When Rana’s husband Korutuzho learned of what had happened, He stormed to His father’s castle and demanded Rana’s release. Sorosotuzho refused, explaining that She had tried to steal from Him and take over control of the universe. Korutuzho asked what He could do to enable Rana’s release. Sorosotuzho suggested Korutuzho could replace Rana in the dungeon. Korutuzho agreed, but said He would only be held half of every year. After some thought, Sorosotuzho accepted His son’s offer. Rana was released. Korutuzho descended into the dungeon, taking the warmth and growth of the summer seasons with Him. Every year, when He is released in the spring, we begin planting once again, and the cycle continues.

With Her husband imprisoned on Her behalf, Rana had even more incentive to obtain the Tablet of Destinies for Him. Her pregnancy was beginning to show, with an expected birth date of the one moon day at the end of the year in the dead of winter. She didn’t have much time.

Rana traveled to Hívo’s home, bringing an endless jug of wine borrowed from Nokí, Goddess of Food. The water god smiled when He opened the door and invited the beautiful goddess inside. As Rana and Hívo sat on His sumptuous sofa, sharing the wine, They discussed an endless array of topics. The more wine Hívo drank, the closer He scooted to Rana and the more sexually suggestive Rana became.

Only when Hívo was well and truly into His cups did Rana broach the subject of the Tablet of Destinies. By that point, Hívo was willing to do anything to be able to hold Rana’s luscious body and have His way with Her. He offered the tablet to Rana, hoping She’d reciprocate by giving Him what He wanted.

She gladly accepted the Tablet of Destinies, thanked Hívo for His hospitality, and promptly left His home. Enraged, Hívo sent His guards after Rana. When they caught up to Her, however, Rana explained that Hívo had gifted Her the tablet of His own free will, and thus He could have no objection to Her taking it. Even though Hívo had been drunk and beguiled by Rana’s femininity, the guards understood that He was still responsible for His own actions. Thus, they let Her go and returned to Hívo empty-handed.

In possession of the Tablet of Destinies and thus the Ruler of the Universe, Rana declared to all that She was merely holding it for Her husband and that He was now the true King of the Gods. Nevertheless, Korutuzho kept His bargain with His father and remained imprisoned.

That winter, Rana gave birth to five children: Sozho, High God of Air; Nuvíní, High Goddess of Earth; Pétíso, God of Death; Voro, God of Hearth Fire; and Vasataté, God of Oceans. Since She had slept with both Korutuzho and Rékaré, She had no way of knowing which children belonged to which god. Nevertheless, Rana declared that all five child gods were the offspring of Her husband, Korutuzho.

When Korutuzho returned to the world, Rana presented Him with the Tablet of Destinies and His children. Korutuzho thanked His wife for wresting control of the universe from His father, but He was highly suspicious of the parentage of the five child gods. He had known Rana was visiting Rékaré behind His back, so Korutuzho suspected that all five children were Rékaré’s. Furthermore, He feared that one of these child gods would supersede Him the way He had superseded His father.

In a fit of fury, Korutuzho began swallowing the children. Voro was the first to go, in one giant gulp. Then down went Nuvíní, followed closely by Pétíso. As Korutuzho swallowed Vasataté with a swig of ale, Rana quickly replaced Sozho with a sack of potatoes wrapped in swaddling cloth.

Korutuzho swallowed the potatoes and sat back on His throne, content that He would rule the universe for all eternity. Rana was shocked and appalled at Her husband’s actions. With the infant Sozho hidden under Her cloak, She ran from Korutuzho’s castle. Instead of heading where Her heart directed Her -- to Rékaré -- Rana took Her infant son to Ríhíví, Goddess of Poisonous Water and Mother to the Gods.

Ríhíví agreed to raise Sozho as Her own son while Rana returned to Korutuzho’s side, satisfied that at least one of Her children had survived.

Several years later, Sozho arrived at Korutuzho’s castle, strong and angry. He stalked across the throne room, whipped out His sword, and slit open His father’s belly. Out fell Sozho’s four siblings, still infants and intact, since Korutuzho had swallowed Them whole.

Overjoyed, Rana ran to Her children and scooped Them up, protecting Them from Her husband. Korutuzho’s craziness had subsided, however, and He did not attempt to eat Them again. Instead, They grew to become some of the most powerful gods in the pantheon.

Through adversity and betrayal, Rana’s love saw Her through, as yours should also. If we would only trust our emotions, our love for our spouses, our love for our children, and, yes, our love for sensuality, then the world would be a far better place. Do not give in to anger. Let Rana, Goddess of Clouds, Love of Loves, Conqueror of Destinies, Mistress of Sexuality and Desire, Mother of the Gods, guide your actions. The world will thank you.