WA

WA is for Western Australia.
Wa. and Wash. are for Washington.

Don't believe the federal government. What do they know?

Only use WA for Washington when mailing a letter via the United States Postal Service, because that's their rule.

Also, USPS made up ZIP codes for their own convenience, so why should we use them any other time?

Happy Holidays!

My calendar from WNPS via Granddad says that today is National Seed Swap Day, so get out there and swap some seeds!

Preferably Australian seeds, for today is also Australia Day!

And how about some Australian ox seeds? Today's the Lunar New Year, of course, and the beginning of the Year of the Ox. Happy New Year!

Yesterday, we watched parts of China's five-hour New Year's variety show. The dancing and acrobatics are fun to watch, but I still don't get the comedy.

IgNobels Announced!

The IgNobels are alternative prizes for scientists whose research isn't deemed serious enough for the Nobel committee, but still is pretty interesting stuff. This year's winners include:

Two Australian researchers from the Commonwealth Scientific and Research Organisation (CSIRO) have won an IgNobel for their research on how many photos you need to take to ensure that nobody in a group photo has their eyes closed.

Ivan Schwab, of the University of California Davis, and the late Philip May, of the University of California Los Angeles, have won the ornithology prize for their pioneering work on the ability of the humble woodpecker to avoid head injury.

Wasmia Al-Houty, of Kuwait University, and Faten Al-Mussalam, of the Kuwait Environment Public Authority, have taken home the nutrition prize for showing that dung beetles are in fact finicky eaters.

Francis Fesmire, of the University of Tennessee, has been awarded the medicine Ig for his report Termination of Intractable Hiccups with Digital Rectal Massage.

Physics laureates Basile Audoly and Sebastien Neukirch of Paris University are to be honoured for their insights into why dry spaghetti tends to break into more than two pieces.

Howard Stapleton of Merthyr Tydfil, Wales, has been awarded the peace prize for inventing an electromechanical teenager repellent. The device makes an annoying noise designed to be audible to teenagers but not to adults. He later used the same technology to make telephone ringtones that are audible to teenagers but not to their teachers.

Three US scientists - Lynn Halpern, Randolph Blake and James Hillenbrand - have been awarded the acoustics prize for conducting experiments to learn why people dislike the sound of fingernails scraping on a blackboard.

While the conclusions of a group of scientists from Valencia University and the University of Illes Balears in Spain are not immediately clear, the judges have deemed their study Ultrasonic Velocity in Cheddar Cheese as Affected by Temperature worthy of the chemistry prize.

Also honoured for cheese research, Bart Knols from Wageningen Agricultural University in the Netherlands has won the biology award for his part in research showing that female malaria mosquito are equally attracted to limburger cheese and human feet.

The scientists take this award seriously nowadays, with 8 of this year's 10 recipients flying to Cambridge, Massachusetts, for the ceremony.

La Lune

Besides today being Brazilian Independence Day, my parents' 37th wedding anniversary (Happy anniversary!), and the Holy Day of Nanímo (God of Anger, Martian calendar only), today also has a full moon, a lunar eclipse, a perigee, and the moon occulting Uranus.

The eclipse is starting soon, peaking at 9:45 or so PDT, so nobody in the Western Hemisphere will be able to see it. Perigee means that the moon is at its closest point to Earth in its orbit this month, so it should look really big. The occultation of Uranus will only be visible (*not* be visible?) from Australia and environs. But if you have a telescope in the US, you should be able to spot Uranus just beside the moon tonight. And if you can't, you better return your Astronomy merit badge.

My Geopolitical Analysis

The Good Guys:
United States of America
Israel
Australia
United Kingdom
South Korea
Taiwan

The Bad Guys:
Iran
North Korea
Syria
Saudi Arabia
China
Russia

News Roundup

The American Bar Association has pulled out of sponsoring a surfing competition for lawyers during their convention in Honolulu because they are afraid of being sued. The organizers have liability insurance, but apparently the ABA knows that's not good enough to stop lawyers! Oh well. At least they're self-aware.

. . . . .

In Tasmania, a bar with beer-drinking pigs has become the target of "animal-rights" activists. Patrons can pay to give the pigs a drink. The bar waters down the beer so the pigs never get drunk (a shame!), and evidently the pigs really like it. On slow days, the bar owners have to give the pigs a drink, or else they'd mope around or something.

The activists say that it's animal cruelty (the RSPCA disagrees) because pigs don't drink beer naturally. But do humans drink alcohol "naturally"? No, we had to work at it and use our great brainpower to create a beverage that ... diminishes our brainpower.

Since we're always being told that pigs are quite smart and similar to humans, why shouldn't our porcine friends benefit from our alcoholic creation?

But I suppose the real question is this: Do beer-fed pigs taste any different?

my teams

At the risk of boring Alyssa to tears...

The US soccer team lost to Ghana, so the Americans are out of the World Cup. Ghana advances, though -- the first non-Europe/Latin-American team to do so. Australia and Korea both have good chances to advance, also, but they're not in yet.

That would mean three of the original twelve non-Europe/Latin-American teams advanced to the second round, and thirteen of the original twenty Europe/Latin-American teams. 25% to 65%. Hmmm... Where do you think the good teams are?

Over in Omaha yesterday, Rice lost to Oregon State. They play again tonight to decide who gets to face North Carolina in the championship. GO OWLS!!!

Soccer

So Poland, Costa Rica, and now Serbia-Montenegro have no chance of making the second round. I guess I can stop rooting for them now.

Australia and South Korea are still both in the thick of it, although Australia can't lose against Croatia on Thursday, or else they're out. Oh well, I guess I'd just root for Croatia in that case!

Ukraine is playing the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia later today. Orange Revolution versus no revolution. Go Ukraine!!

I guess Lister won't be the first...

LISTER: It's only three feet. They can wade. That's why the animals are gonna hafta be quite tall.

RIMMER: Nice plan, Lister. Excellent plan! Brilliant plan, Lister! What about the sheep? What are you going to do, buy them water-wings? Fit them with stilts? Better still, you could cross-breed them with dolphins and have leaping mutton. (Gesturing with his pen to represent a woolly dolphin leaping out of the water) Baa, splash, baa, splash.

LISTER: You can get a drainage grant these days.

RIMMER: Why bother, Lister? You could be the first man to produce wet-look knitwear.

-Red Dwarf, "The End"

"Woolly beachwear, merino bikinis impress fashionistas" (ABC, May 3)

Freedom in the World

In which of the following countries would you rather live:

Burma
Cuba
Libya
North Korea
Sudan
Syria
Turkmenistan
Uzbekistan
Tibet
Chechnya

These are the countries (and territories) ranked as the least-free places in the world by the Freedom House, with a maximum 7 score in both Political Rights and Civil Liberties. I guess the real question isn't whether you want to live there, but what should we do to improve democracy and freedoms in these lands?

Just so you know, the best countries (with a minimum 1 score in both categories) are:

Andorra
Australia
Austria
Bahamas
Barbados
Belgium
Canada
Cape Verde
Chile
Costa Rica
Cyprus
Czech Republic
Denmark
Dominica
Estonia
Finland
France
Germany
Hungary
Iceland
Ireland
Italy
Kiribati
Latvia
Liectenstein
Lithuania
Malta
Marshall Islands
Mauritius
Micronesia
Nauru
Netherlands
New Zealand
Norway
Palau
Poland
Portugal
Saint Kitts and Nevis
Saint Lucia
San Marino
Slovakia
Slovenia
Spain
Sweden
Switzerland
Taiwan
Tuvalu
United Kingdom
United States
Uruguay
Puerto Rico

Holidays

January:
New Year's Day
Epiphany
Elvis Presley's Birthday
Coming-of-Age Day
Clean-Off-Your-Desk Day
Holy Day of Vítí
Ben Franklin's Birthday
Unhappiest Day
Australia Day
Seed Swap Day

February:
Groundhog Day
Chinese New Year's Day
Naraka Day
Waitangi Day
Holy Day of Néhété
Valentine's Day
Valentine's Day (Martian)
Presidents' Day
Holy Day of Nazhoro
Invasive Weeds Awareness Week
Narakan National Anthem Day
Mardi Gras
Holy Day of Vuzhí
Holy Day of Vuzhí (Martian)
Leap Day

March:
Texas Independence Day
Girl Scouts Week
Johnny Appleseed Day
Jet Lag Day
Holy Day of Hérazha
Vernal Equinox
Vernal Equinox (Martian)
Easter
Holy Day of Sozho
Feast of Zhaké

April:
April Fools Day
Holy Day of Rézhíní
Arbor Day (Washington)
Thomas Jefferson's Birthday
Tax Day
Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter Day (Martian)
Patriots Day
Holy Day of Rakazhazhíní
San Jacinto Day
St. George's Day
Feast of Vasataté

May:
May Day
Cinco De Mayo
Mothers Day
Holy Day of Sívorí
Mount St. Helens Day
Holy Day of Sorosotuzho
Towel Day

June:
Donut Day
Holy Day of Névazhíno
Flag Day
Fathers Day
Summer Solstice
Happiest Day
Holy Day of Zhíanoso
Feast of Hérazhahívo
Feast of Píríuso
My Birthday
Our Wedding Anniversary

July:
Chunlin's Birthday
Independence Day (Observed)
Independence Day
Viking 1 Lander Day (Martian)
Feast of Hívo
Apollo 11 Day
Holy Day of Zhoro
Cheesecake Day

August:
Elvis Week
Indian Independence Day
Feast of Kara
Feast of Rívorí
Holy Day of Rívorí (Martian)
Holy Day of Nanímo (Martian)

September:
Brazilian Independence Day
My Parents' Wedding Anniversary
Patriot Day
Feast of Korutuzho
Central American Independence Day
Birthday of Seth, son of Adam
Feast ff Nuvíní
Autumnal Equinox
Feast of Huro
Feast of Huro (Martian)
Rosh Hashanah
Jim and Bexley Lister's Birthday
Michaelmas

October:
Holy Day of Tarénara
Day of German Unity
Yortè
Canadian Thanksgiving
Columbus Day (Observed)
Columbus Day
Mariner 7 Day (Martian)
Boss' Day
Holy Day of Ríhíví
Feast of Rékaré
United Nations Day
Emma Revel Howland's Birthday
Halloween

November:
Feast of Nokí
Election Day
Methuselah's Birthday
200th Day of the King's Return from the Eastern Continent
Feast of Rana
Veterans Day
JFK Day
Corrugated Cardboard Day
Thanksgiving
Thanksgiving Friday

December:
Feast of Hívuítoví
Hanukkah
Réní-Mamurd's Birthday
Lucia Day
Bill of Rights Day
Feast of Pétíso
Winter Solstice
Christmas Eve Eve
Christmas Eve
Christmas
Third Day of Christmas
Sarıman New Year's Festival (Martian)
Narakan New Year's Day
Feast of Kérasa
Holy Day of Voro

Australia Day, part 2

And, to continue the celebration of Australia Day, here's another bit of Aussie culture. . . Monty Python style:

Wine Expert: A lot of people in this country pooh-pooh Australian table wines. This is a pity as many fine Australian wines appeal not only to the Australian palate but also to the cognoscenti of Great Britain.

Black Stump Bordeaux is rightly praised as a peppermint flavoured Burgundy, whilst a good Sydney Syrup can rank with any of the world's best sugary wines.Château Blue, too, has won many prizes; not least for its taste, and its lingering afterburn.

Old Smokey 1968 has been compared favourably to a Welsh claret, whilst the Australian Wino Society thoroughly recommends a 1970 Coq du Rod Laver, which, believe me, has a kick on it like a mule: 8 bottles of this and you're really finished. At the opening of the Sydney Bridge Club, they were fishing them out of the main sewers every half an hour.

Of the sparkling wines, the most famous is Perth Pink. This is a bottle with a message in, and the message is 'beware.' This is not a wine for drinking, this is a wine for laying down and avoiding.

Another good fighting wine is Melbourne Old-and-Yellow, which is particularly heavy and should be used only for hand-to-hand combat.

Quite the reverse is true of Château Chunder, which is an appellation contrôlée, specially grown for those keen on regurgitation; a fine wine which really opens up the sluices at both ends.

Real emetic fans will also go for a Hobart Muddy, and a prize winning Cuivre Reserve Château Bottled Nuit San Wogga Wogga, which has a bouquet like an aborigine's armpit.

Australia Day

I suppose I should've posted this yesterday, because it's almost tomorrow in Aussieland, but oh well. Happy Australia Day!

Fourth Bruce: Gentleman, I'd like to introduce a man from Pommeyland who is joinin' us this year in the philosophy department at the University of Walamaloo.

Everybruce: G'day!

Michael: Hello.

Fourth Bruce: Michael Baldwin, Bruce. Michael Baldwin, Bruce. Michael Baldwin, Bruce.

First Bruce: Is your name not Bruce?

Michael: No, it's Michael.

Second Bruce: That's going to cause a little confusion.

Third Bruce: Mind if we call you "Bruce" to keep it clear?

Fourth Bruce: Gentlemen, I think we better start the faculty meeting. Before we start, though, I'd like to ask the padre for a prayer.

First Bruce: Oh Lord, we beseech Thee, Amen!!

Everybruce: Amen!

Fourth Bruce: Crack tubes! (Sound of cans opening) Now I call upon Bruce to officially welcome Mr. Baldwin to the philosophy faculty.

Second Bruce: I'd like to welcome the pommey bastard to God's own Earth, and remind him that we don't like stuck-up sticky-beaks here.

Everybruce: Hear, hear! Well spoken, Bruce!

Fourth Bruce: Bruce here teaches classical philosophy, Bruce there teaches Haegelian philosophy, and Bruce here teaches logical positivism. And is also in charge of the sheep dip.

Third Bruce: What's New-Bruce going to teach?

Fourth Bruce: New-Bruce will be teaching political science, Machiavelli, Bentham, Locke, Hobbes, Sutcliffe, Bradman, Lindwall, Miller, Hassett, and Benaud.

Second Bruce: Those are all cricketers!

Fourth Bruce: Aw, spit!

Third Bruce: Hails of derisive laughter, Bruce!

Everybruce: Australia, Australia, Australia, Australia, we love you amen!

Fourth Bruce: Crack tube! (Sound of cans opening) Any questions?

Second Bruce: New-Bruce, are you a Poofter?

Fourth Bruce: Are you a Poofter?

Michael: No!

Fourth Bruce: No. Right, I just want to remind you of the faculty rules: Rule One!

Everybruce: No Poofters!

Fourth Bruce: Rule Two, no member of the faculty is to maltreat the Abbos in any way at all -- if there's anybody watching. Rule Three?

Everybruce: No Poofters!!

Fourth Bruce: Rule Four, now this term, I don't want to catch anybody not drinking. Rule Five,

Everybruce: No Poofters!

Fourth Bruce: Rule Six, there is NO ... Rule Six. Rule Seven,

Everybruce: No Poofters!!

Fourth Bruce: Right, that concludes the readin' of the rules. Bruce.

First Bruce: This here's the wattle, the emblem of our land. You can stick it in a bottle, you can hold it in your hand.

Everybruce: Amen!

May your next life be better...

Happy Pétíso Day!

Today is, of course, the Holy Day of Pétíso, the God of Death. It is time to thank Him for something or another, reincarnation, yadda yadda yadda. It's also the Winter Solstice, so things will start getting lighter around here. Just in the nick of time, if you ask me.

On the other hand, if you're in Australia or Chile or some other warm place south of the equator, welcome to summer!

Happy Equinox!!

Finally, spring is here! Or there, actually. Australia, South Africa, Argentina, those kind of places...

For the majority of the population of our planet, however, it is now autumn. You like autumn, right? Leaves and pumpkins and all that? Yeah, I thought so.

Fruit Flies Like a Banana

Do you believe that "global warming" is going to destroy the world? Or do you believe that species "evolve"?

Here's what fruit flies have to say about it.

And yes, that was an either-or question.