Life in the Death Star

[A Star Wars parody of "Life in the Fast Lane" by the Eagles]

Han was a hard-headed man
He was brutally handsome
Leia was terminally pretty
They locked her up
And they held without ransom
In the heart of the spherical city

Luke said to gently bind Chewbacca
As a cruel dude
They said he was fearsome
They said he was rude
Guards had one thing in common
They were suddenly dead
Han said, "Faster, faster
"The lights are blinking red!"

Life in the Death Star
Surely make you lose your mind
Life in the Death Star

Trapped with her highness
Hot from the flames
"It isn't my fault, miss
"Luke is the brains"
Leia shot a chute open
And down they all fell
They landed in garbage
What a wonderful smell

There was a creature in the water
A creature 'round Luke's face
The dianoga got him
Luke was gone without a trace
Walls started closing in
And Luke was okay
They would surely have been crushed to death
If Artoo hadn't saved the day

Life in the Death Star
Surely make you lose your mind
Life in the Death Star
Life in the Death Star
On the run all the time
Life in the Death Star

Stormtroopers found them
Chased them to thirst
They didn't see the bridge out
Took a turn for the worst
She said, "Listen mister
"You can hear the Wilhelm scream
"You shot the extender panel
"Haven't done a goddamn thing"

Luke said, "Hold my blaster
"I think I got a plan
"The bad guys, they are coming
"So I got to be the man"
They went swinging 'cross the chasm
Ran around and got lost
They really did care
They were just dying to get off

And it was life in the Death Star
Surely make you lose your mind
Life in the Death Star
Life in the Death Star
On the run all the time
Life in the Death Star